Events of the 20th Week

I am thankful that my pregnancy has been so pleasant so far.  This week has been a bit tough, though.  I'm not positive how much is pregnancy and how much is the beginning of the year.  I went into work on Monday to collaborate with a new chemistry teacher.  A bunch of teachers walked a few blocks to a local McAlister's for lunch.  I felt like I waddled along the entire way.  (A few days before I was walking down the hall at the house and Tim, who was apparently watching me walk away from him exclaimed, "You are waddling!")  And I was breathing way too hard for the minimal exercise required.  I went home and worked until bedtime on curriculum. (Dumb me has decided to revamp the entire chemistry curriculum.  I think it will be better for the kids, but it's not easy to have to start over from scracth.)

Tuesday was another LONG day.  I got up at 6:30 am for my first work day.  (Unfortunately, I went to bed too late, so getting up this early was a bit of a struggle!)  It was a long and laborious day trying to get things ready for the kids.  I then had to leave work at 3 pm to meet a girl about childcare.  She is pregnant as well, but she is due November 28th. So, she is looking for a way to supplement their income while staying home.  I met her at a mutual friends house. It was a pleasant time and three hours passed by quickly.

I am still sorting out my options in regard to childcare.  I am trying to decide between daycare versus private homes.  There is also a wide monetary margin.  I have been quoted anywhere between $70/week to $320/week!  This is definitely one of my biggest stresses right now. I'm praying that we find a good solution, so that I can rest easier. 

Within 15 minutes of arriving home, girls from church arrived.  I had volunteered my house for a girls night. We chatted and ate pizza.  It was low-key and fun getting to know a few girls better.

I took Wednesday off with the intention of speaking with Human Resources (HR) about maternity leave.  Before contacting HR, I decided to go to the gym where I walked for an hour.  (Perhaps that was a bit too long because my lower back has been throbbing ever since. I have since been trying to walk only 20-30 minutes.) 

Once I got home, I contacted HR. They pretty much confirmed what I already knew.  My maternity leave begins the moment the baby is born.  I am able to take an unpaid maternity leave for 6 weeks. During that time, I may opt to use sick days if I have enough...I have 10 weeks, so I defintely have enough.  If I would like to take longer than 6 weeks, then I have to submit more paperwork for child rearing leave.  I am unable to use any accrued days during this time because "I'm not sick."  (There is a tiny loophole here. If my doctor says that I need longer than 6 weeks then I can use more of my accrued day.)  If I take longer than 12 weeks, I lose my health insurance.  I was happy to learn that I would not, however, lose building rights (the ability to stay working at my same high school) unless I took off longer than 18 weeks.

I know that I am in a better situation than some people in our country, but I wish it wasn't so difficult to be able to spend those important first moments with our son.  Further, since I am the primary income in our family, losing my income is difficult.  In order to take unpaid leave, we will have to live on our savings for a while. 

Maybe as a result of my long walk and maternity leave worries, I had a difficult time sleeping that night. I woke up at 3 am and was never able to get back to sleep.  I had calf cramps, back pain, and my mind kept racing.

There are so many things to think about right now! 

School: classroom management decisions, physical arrangement and preparation of  my room, curriculum desgin and daily lessons, finding a replacement academic coordinator, finding a chemistry-certified substitute for my leave, preparing a good collaboration experience with the special education teacher who will be in my classroom for two periods, working out scheduling kinks, figuring out where in the building I can pump when the time comes, collaborating with new chemistry teachers, preparing chemical supply lists, figuring out how to get copies made, learning 150 names and all their individual education plans...

Home: bathroom and spare room remodel, researching and buying a new car, keeping up with daily chores...

Baby: finding childcare, finding a pediatrician, researching the "right" baby stuff (strollers, car seats, cribs), getting baby stuff, preparing the nursery, baby classes, registries, showers, eating the right stuff so the baby will be okay, budgeting, health insurance, figure out a baby name, birth plan (doula, epidural?)...

I know this rant seems like I might be super stressed right now. Maybe I am. Maybe I'm in denial. I don't know.  I feel like I'm handling everything pretty well.

Additionally, Tim and I were hit with a major bombshell today. Tim has been writing a musical wherein he has had to decide what each characters will do next. Tonight, he said that he feels like another character in that he needs to decide his next move...and the decision is not easy.  Please pray for us.

Comments

[Megan Darnell]

So sorry things are stressful. I went through the same thing when I found out we were pregnant with Aiden. Money was already tight, I had NO sick days saved up, and childcare in Ashland was questionable. I found an in-home place that was $35/day. It was a good deal considering. I ended up not going back when he was considered a high SIDS risk, which made money even tighter. As hard as it is to think right now, it will all work out in the end. I'll say a lot of prayers for you all for guidance.